Let's Play- Make Fun Of Annoyingly Egotistical Hollywood Stars!....

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Why? Because you can, that's why. If you want to read more about Annoyingly Egotistical Hollywood Actors, head on over to the Superficial, and put your drink down.

First up?

Tom Cruise: Star of the single most homo-erotic "supposedly straight" guy movie ever. Top Gun. This movie has the added distinction of ranking #1 at the Best Page in the Universe's list of 5 Shitty Movies Everyone Loves-

"For those of you who don't remember, "Top Gun" was the movie about a bunch of guys who stand around high-fiving each other for about 90 minutes. The movie focuses on some loser named "Maverick" who penetrates deep into the coveted veil of the top gun academy of smug, sexually frustrated aviators. I know many of you reading this will probably think I'm exaggerating when I say this (since I exaggerate everything, except for my manliness which is enviable), but there were no fewer than 500 shower scenes in this movie. The wardrobe for this film must have consisted of a towel, a jump suit, and 50 pages of gay innuendo, because the rest of the time Tom Cruise and Val Kilmer were walking around naked eyeing each other's packages."

Perhaps lately you have heard the our boy Tom has taken a fancy to Katie Holmes, famous actress herself. Famous for what, don't ask cause I don't know, but rest assured she's famous. Tommy-boy don't date no commoners.

Katie, if you're reading this, which I can't imagine why you would be, look at for Tommy-boy, he's a little on the freaky side.

Actor Tom Cruise Opens Up about his Beliefs in the Church of Scientology

Actor Tom Cruise talks about his 20-year membership in the Church of Scientology as he and Director Steven Spielberg discuss the filming of the soon-to-be-released "War of the Worlds." The film, coming out June 29, plays off Americans' fears about terrorism. Spielberg says he has always wanted to direct a "really mean invasion from outer space." Cruise insists, "I just want to help people."

Uh-huh.

Let's go to the tale of the tape, shall we?

Katie and Tom before-



And Kate post kissy-face with Tom-



Blegh.

Let this be a lesson to you girls out there who lust after Hollywood bigshots. Just read what this very smart girl says in the following essay, Why Geeks and Nerds Are Worth It, and tell me I'm wrong.

The saying used to be, "Nice Guys Finish Last".. Well, I'm here to tell you the updated version of this saying-Nice Guys Don't Have Herpes.

And We Don't Give Them Away Either.