Wednesday, April 27, 2005

We Need To Stop Doing Everything Until Cookiegate Is Settled.....


Have you heard about this?

Has Cookie Monster given up sweets?

'Sesame Street' advocates healthy eating habits

Hoots the Owl explains the benefits of fruits and vegetables to Cookie Monster.

NEW YORK (AP) -- Something must be wrong in the land of Muppets.

First PBS announced that "Sesame Street" would kick off its 35th season this week with a multiyear story arc about healthy habits. No problem there; childhood obesity rates are soaring. Then I learned of changes that turned my "Sesame Street" world upside-down.

My beloved blue, furry monster -- who sang "C is for cookie, that's good enough for me" -- is now advocating eating healthy. There's even a new song -- "A Cookie Is a Sometimes Food," where Cookie Monster learns there are "anytime" foods and "sometimes" foods.

Talking vegetables

I picked up the telephone. "What's going on with Cookie Monster?" I asked the "Sesame Street" press office. "Why are you doing this?"

They sent me to Dr. Rosemarie T. Truglio, the show's vice president of research and education.

She said the show changes every year, focusing not just on teaching numbers and letters but also emotional and physical health. With the rise in childhood obesity, Truglio said "Sesame Street" is concentrating on the need to teach children about healthy foods and physical activity.




Sheila O'Malley, over at the Sheila Variations puts this outrage in to words I dare say could not be said any better...

"To me, Cookie Monster, you will always be:

A blue. Furry. Googly-eyed. Cookie-eating. LUNATIC.

Beloved by children everywhere.

Your name is Cookie MONSTER. Mkay? Not Cookie LOVER, or Cookie Boy, or Cookie Afficianado. You are a MONSTER and your whole life is about COOKIES. You do not have a normal level of desire. In fact, you are so obsessed with cookies that THAT THAT IS YOUR NAME. This has never ceased to amaze me. Ernie loved his Rubber Ducky, sure, but his name was not "Rubber Ducky", his name was Ernie. You took your obsession to such new heights that no one could call you anything else.

How many of us can say that? Is my name Old Movies? No. Is my name Central Asia or Founding Fathers? No. My name is Sheila. Not too many of us live our entire lives harboring only ONE GOAL, and holding up that ONE GOAL above all others. It takes courage, drive, and commitment. You haven't taken your eye off the cookie once.

Until now.

Now they will force you to say that cookies are only good for you SOMEtimes. This must KILL you, Cookie. That would be like some stupid group of unimaginative people making me do a commercial where I said, "It's okay if you like old movies ... just don't like them TOO MUCH."

Those people don't understand passion like yours, those people wouldn't know how to love something in the feverish way that you love cookies. They are JEALOUS. They want to CONTROL you. Perhaps, like Mitch suggests, they want to call you "The Moderate Monster". They look at your wacko eyes and they hear your caveman syntax ... and they can't stand your wildness, they can't stand the greatness of you, they rush in to tamp you down. It has taken them 25 years ... but now it has occurred. You will now become a mouthpiece for their fear and caution.

It must kill you. I can only imagine, Cookie, the shame. The shame of being forced to betray your deepest held convictions about cookies.

Cookie, let me tell you this. I will not forget the old Cookie Monster madman. I will still believe that you are IN THERE, even though they won't let you show it anymore.

I will still remember fondly that time you ate the telephone because it looked like a cookie. Good for you! You had the cord hanging out of your mouth, and your googled-eyes suddenly looked flat and very confused. But still: good for you, you gave it your best shot."

Yet another fond childhood memory has been shot to pieces on account of political correctness. Bugs Bunny? Ruined. Cookie Monster? On a diet. The Grinch who stole Christmas? Jim Freakin Carrey. Next thing you know the'll outlaw Lego's because too many idiotic kids can't stop trying to eat them.

Breaks my heart I tellsya...

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